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It might be that we
Started off on the right
Or the wrong or the left
Foot, or beneath the bed
I don't know just don't know
What I shouldn't have 
Or what I could have said,
But the past is dead
And the future is crowning
This wilting present
Cannot withstand will not stand
The glaring brazen sun,
And we're standing around
Like strangers in a Starbucks line
Looking over our shoulders
Like we're hiking among
Prowling tigers and venomous
Snakes waiting lurking to strike,
Can't make eye contact 
Like we're glancing into a
Flashlight revealing who
We really are, but naked even
We try and run away to hide 
What we bare with ease 
To a random stranger
In the night lost; forgotten
Like a blown into tissue
You save to use again,
Where do we begin anew?
Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you; I'm...
APAD13 - 043


I really liked this piece - it kept my eyeballs and my lips moving. That said, it has an inconsistent approach to punctuation that I think needs a second look. It's hard to suggest any one place, but I slipped from one strong thought into the middle of another more than once. A few commas here and there might provide the pacing needed to appreciate the full work. Experiment with it; it's your call to make.